


The Meaning of Home

by blackjacktheboss



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: F/M, anti Paul blofis hive let's get it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-02-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:41:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22549516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackjacktheboss/pseuds/blackjacktheboss
Summary: the second official meeting of the Anti-Paul Club
Comments: 11
Kudos: 186





	The Meaning of Home

**Author's Note:**

> Hannah as always was my proof reading angel

_What does home mean to you?_ the writing prompt at her workshop had read. 

Sally sits at her kitchen table, Donny Hathaway’s voice flowing through her apartment, as she contemplates the word. _Home_. She smiles as Percy pops into her head, recalling the first moment she felt him kick and everything she ever wanted for him flashed through her mind. Her smile becomes sad as she thinks of her parents and how few memories she has with them, but the ones that remain are full of joy and she guards them like treasures. Her uncle became a sense of home at some point, she couldn’t say when, but even he faded away, life once more taking the comfort and meaning of home from her. 

Then she met Po, and she can’t help the way her cheeks get hot as she remembers their time together that one fateful summer (and their attempts at goodbyes later that fall). Every moment with him had been like a fairytale, and her heart ached for the way she felt when he held her in his arms. When they said their final goodbye, it had been on her terms and very rarely has she regretted that choice but for a time, he had become her safe haven and when he left, he took a piece of her heart with him to the bottom of the sea. 

Of course, she couldn’t forget Gabe (no matter how hard she tries) but the memories no longer have a choke hold on her as they once did. It was a time in her life when home was a field riddled with land mines, a place neither she nor her son could really rest or take comfort from. It wasn’t a home, merely an enclosed space that she happened to inhabit like a tiger pacing it’s cage in a zoo. She knew that wasn’t where she was meant to be, but she also had no idea how to find a way out. Except now she is free and here she sits in a place of her own making that no one can take from her or Percy. Somewhere she can really call home, a sanctuary where her and Percy can truly be themselves, The Jacksons, ready to take on whatever world awaits them on the other side of their front door. 

She scribbles all of these thoughts down, her hand doing its best to keep up with her racing mind, when she is interrupted by a knock on the door. Frowning, she gets up to answer only to smile when she sees Paul standing on the other side, holding a bouquet of flowers. 

“Did I know you were coming?” she asks happily as she ushers him in and takes the flowers.

He places a kiss to her cheek as he walks past. “No, just missed you and thought I’d drop by.” 

Paul follows her to the kitchen and takes a seat at the table as she places her flowers in water, taking a moment to breathe in their beautiful fragrance. 

“Thank you for the flowers, they’re beautiful.” 

Paul smiles lovingly. “Of course. I hoped they’d put a smile on your face.” 

“Well, mission accomplished,” she says with a laugh. 

“No Percy tonight?” he asks. 

“No, he is getting together with some Camp friends so he’s gone for the weekend,” she says as she takes her seat. 

“You’re such a cool mom,” he comments. “I don’t think my parents would have ever let me go somewhere for a whole weekend.” 

“Well, they’re a special group of kids,” she says with a tempered smile. “Camp is the first place Percy’s ever felt totally comfortable so when he needs to go spend time with them, I let it happen. He’s a good kid. Plus I like to give him a hard time about seeing Annabeth, he gets so flustered.” 

Paul laughs with her, and there’s a twinkle in his eye Sally hasn’t seen before. “He’s a great kid. You two are lucky to have each other. And I’m just as lucky to have you both.” 

“We sure are a lucky bunch,” she says, then leans in conspiratorially. “But I have to admit, the quiet can be nice sometimes when he’s gone.” 

Paul leans in too and notices Sally’s open notebook, nodding towards it. “Gives you plenty of time to write too, I bet. Whatcha working on?” 

She leans back in her chair and shyly smooths down the journal’s soft pages before closing it. “Just a little prompt for that workshop I’m in.” 

“Can I ask what the prompt is?” 

“It’s about the meaning of home. It’s meant to be one of those show don’t tell exercises.” 

The unfamiliar twinkle reappears in Paul’s eyes, and in a flash that somehow also feels like slow motion, he is in front of her down on one knee, taking her hand in his. 

“I think I’d like to do a little show don’t tell exercise of my own, if that’s okay,” he almost whispers. 

“Paul—“ 

“Sally, I love you more than anything. Our time together has been the best of my life. Will you marry me?” 

Sally’s body is suddenly tense and her mouth has gone dry, opening and closing several times but unable to actually speak any words. 

Paul smiles sheepishly. “I’m sorry to do it like this, it wasn’t my original plan. I just… you look so perfect here at the table writing and that prompt…it felt like a sign. I couldn’t help myself. I love you, Sally.” 

Sally swallows hard, though it’s mostly air she chokes down. “I love you too, Paul.” 

His smile widens. “So say yes!” 

Sally’s mouth opens and closes again. “Paul, I… we don’t even live together yet.”

“Practically,” he says with a confident shrug. 

“We haven’t been together all that long,” she says, a bit breathless. 

Paul’s smile remains. “We’re not exactly 18, Sally. At our age, why waste any time? I love you, I love Percy, and I want us to keep building a life together.” 

“And Percy!” Sally says, exasperated. “I can’t just spring something like this on him.” 

Paul smiles reassuringly, closing his hand tighter around hers. “He gave me his blessing. He gave _us_ his blessing.” 

Sally feels as if the walls of her apartment have started closing in on her and she has to stand, to get away from Paul and his self-assuredness. She pulls her hand from his and stands, pacing into the middle of the kitchen to take a deep, calming breath.

She whips around to face Paul, who is now standing, doing her best to shove down the anger threatening to bubble up and out of her. “When did you talk to Percy?” 

Paul slips his hands into his pockets. “On his birthday.” 

A fire rages in the pit of Sally’s belly, heating her up from the inside out. 

“Why do you seem so upset?” Paul asks taking a step forward, confusion painting his face. “I thought I was doing the right thing.” 

“By talking to my 15 year old on his birthday about proposing to me when you’ve barely spoken to me about it?” 

Sally recognizes the hurt that carves its way into Paul’s features, but the fire in her burns away all traces of sympathy. 

Paul hesitates for a moment but the words spill out anyway. “Is this because Percy’s father is back in the picture?”

Sally crosses her arms. “I knew that bothered you more than you said.” 

“Don’t you think Percy needs a dad?” Paul asks, his frustration mounting.

Sally’s spine tingles with rage and her voice is flat when she says, “He has a dad, Paul.” 

“I mean a real dad,” Paul shoots back. “Not someone who breezes in with birthday gifts whenever it’s convenient for him.” 

“Do not talk about Po like that. He’s a good man, you just wouldn’t understand his circumstances. He’s done what he can and he loves Percy.” 

Paul’s face hardens in a way that Sally has never seen before, and it makes her stomach turn. “Are you still in love with him?” 

“Jesus Christ, Paul, really?” she says, rolling her eyes.

“Answer the question. I think I have the right to know, and I couldn’t help but notice his name on that page you were writing.” 

Sally deflates, shedding some of her anger out of pity. “He’s the father of my son, I’m always going to love him.” 

“That’s not what I asked.” 

“Insecurity isn’t a good color on you.” 

“Well, lying isn’t a good color on you.” 

Another surge of anger flows through her and she throws up her arms. “Yes! Okay? Yes. A part of me is still in love with him and probably always will be. Is that what you want to hear?” 

Paul runs a hand down his face. “No, it’s not what I want to hear. Of course it’s not, but I’m trying to build a life with you and that’s kind of hard to do when I’m competing against the shadow of someone who walked out on you when you were pregnant.” 

“This isn’t about Po!” she shouts. “I loved him and we have a son together, that’s it. Nothing else will ever happen with him. This is about me and you.” 

“I thought we were happy!” he shouts, his anger boiling over. “It feels like I scared you with the proposal and I’m sorry, but please don’t use that as an excuse to push me away right now.” 

Sally wrings her hands and looks down at Paul’s feet, unable to meet his eyes. “I’m pushing you away right now because I’m realizing we want different things.” 

Paul shakes his head. “No, you’re just scared.” 

“Don’t you dare tell me about myself. Don’t even try it. I’ve had enough of that for several lifetimes, thank you very much. And of course I’m scared,” she says, her voice softening. “But that doesn’t make what I’m saying any less true.” 

Paul’s eyes are glossed over with a mix of sadness and confusion. 

“You have no idea what I went through with my late husband. And no idea what I put Percy through with that marriage. When it ended, I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again. I can't... I _won’t._ ” 

Paul takes a step forward and while Sally’s emotional walls are up, she holds her ground and lets him come close enough to put his hands on the sides of her shoulders. “Sally, I would never hurt you or Percy. I love you. Both of you.” 

Sally looks him right in the eye and doesn’t flinch, but she feels so small. “We’ve heard that before.” 

A look of betrayal flashes across Paul’s face, as if he can’t believe she would ever be afraid of him, but she’s been with a man that wore a mask of niceness before, and she’ll be damned if she lets it happen again. 

“He gave me his blessing,” he says dejectedly, sinking into the nearest seat. 

Sally walks over to sit in the chair next to him and speaks softly. “Percy would give me his blessing to rob a store if he thought it was what I really wanted, Paul. He’s a fifteen year old kid who has been through more than any one person should go through, and he has always wanted to take care of me since he was a little boy. It worries me a bit that you don’t see that.” 

Paul nods to himself slowly as he takes in her words. “So what are you saying?” 

“I can’t marry you,” she says sadly. “There’s still so much we don’t know about each other. And, I’m just not ready to take that step. I don’t think Percy really is either.” 

Paul looks back up at Sally, his eyes holding back tears. “What about someday?” 

Sally chews on her bottom lip as she contemplates how to answer. “I don’t know, Paul. I can’t make you any promises right now.” 

Paul again nods to himself, rubbing the back of his head nervously. “I want to get married, Sally.” 

“I know,” she says, her voice quiet. 

“And I want to have another kid,” he says, his voice cracking. “Maybe two.” 

“I know,” she says, a single tear streaming down her cheek. “And you deserve those things.” 

“But I can’t have them with you?” he asks, knowing the answer in his heart, but still gripping onto hope. 

“No,” she says, and though more tears are now falling, her voice is strong and sure. “I’m sorry, but… that’s not what I want. I need to focus on rebuilding my life with Percy. There’s still so much we haven’t dealt with, and I didn’t give us any time at all really to just be us before I started things with you. I honestly just don’t see my life including ever getting married again and certainly not having more kids, no matter how wonderful or loving you’ve been to us. And you have been absolutely incredible.” 

Paul hides his face in his hands as he leans on the table, taking deep, shaky breaths. Sally watches him with her hand over her mouth, doing her best to control her own breathing. 

“I’m so sorry, Paul.” 

He drops his hands to rest his arms on the table in front of him, taking another slow and shaky breath. “I’m sorry if I put you on the spot, I just— I really thought we we both wanted the same future.” 

Sally places a hand on Paul's arm and squeezes gently. “I don’t think I really knew what I wanted until I saw you down on your knee.” 

Paul nods and looks Sally in the eye, smiling weakly. “I’m not sure I can wait, Sally.” 

Sally bites her bottom lip. “I’m not asking you to.” 

She can see a new wave of pain wash over Paul as he stands from the table. “I’m gonna go.”

Sally stands and the short distance between them suddenly feels awkward. “Are you sure? You could stay and we could talk some more.” 

Paul can’t look Sally in the eye. “I think we’ve said what we needed to. I, uh, I need some space to think.” 

Sally nods, looking down. “I understand.” 

“Can you just, uh, tell Percy I’ll see him at school?” 

Sally nods silently and keeps her eyes closed as the sound of Paul’s footsteps fade through the entryway culminating in the slam of the front door. She melts back into her seat and lets the floodgates break open, crumpling onto her table. 

_Why did he have to go and ruin things?_ she thinks. _Everything would have been fine if he just hadn’t pushed it._

Except deep down she knows that isn’t true. She knows that eventually, they would have come to this conclusion and maybe it’s better for everyone that it happened sooner rather than later. Life has taught her the hard way that nice isn’t kind, and no matter how much she hates that she has hurt Paul, she would have hated being his wife even more. The truth of that begins to settle into her gut, calming her breathing and slowing the beating of her heart. 

_Gabe is gone and we are safe,_ she tells herself. _We have a home and no one can take that from us. I’ve spent too long living on other people’s turns, and now is the time for me to get to live on my own._

The tears slow until they have stopped completely, and when she opens her eyes, Sally feels lighter. She would love to reach out to a friend but it dawns on her that she hasn’t really made any in her new adult life, a bad habit from her life with Gabe in which he had to be the center of her attention. 

She is alone, but it doesn’t hurt the way she thought it would. 

Wandering into her living room, she smiles at the sight of Percy’s sweatshirt strewn across the couch. She picks it up and folds it, reveling in the quiet magic of such a mundane moment. There was such a long time where she was treading water, unable to be the mother she really wanted to be, but here she is, picking up after her messy teenage son as he runs around doing god knows what with his friends. A taste of normalcy. 

Another wave of sadness comes crashing over her as she imagines what life might have been like had she said yes to Paul. A small, intimate wedding with Percy looking handsome in a suit, moving to a slightly bigger apartment, having a baby, maybe a little girl this time. Aspects of it call to her, perhaps the way a siren might, but the more she thinks about it the more she realizes that like the sirens, that life too would have led her crashing into jagged rocks. 

_Alone does not mean lonely,_ she thinks. 

She is alone, and it doesn’t hurt the way she was scared it might. 

A melodious cascade of piano keys crashes its way through the silence, pulling Sally out of her head, and Donny Hathaway is there to greet her. 

> _I've been so many places in my life and time_
> 
> _I've sung a lot of songs_
> 
> _I've made some bad rhymes_
> 
> _I've acted out my life in stages_
> 
> _With ten thousand people watching_
> 
> _But we're alone now_
> 
> _And I'm singing this song to you_

Sally smiles to herself, remembering a stormy summer night when her and Po danced to this song in her cabin, and she slowly begins to sway. The cabin was completely dark save for the light of a fire illuminating the silhouettes of their bare bodies pressed against one another. They swayed back and forth together that night, living in their own world where things were simple and they were just two people in love. 

_What does home mean to you?_

A happy tear trails down Sally’s cheek as she continues to sway to the song. “Being in Po’s arms,” she says to herself with a wide smile. “It all started with him.” 

> _You taught me precious secrets_
> 
> _Of a true love_
> 
> _You wanted nothing_
> 
> _You came out in front_
> 
> _When I was hiding_
> 
> _But now I'm so much better_
> 
> _And if my words don't come together_
> 
> _Listen to the melody_
> 
> _'Cause my love is in there hiding_

The aroma of a fresh ocean breeze overwhelms Sally’s senses, and as she opens her eyes, Poseidon appears in front of her, looking as handsome as ever. He takes her into his arms, his dazzling smile spread from ear to ear, and in a raspy voice perhaps better suited for drunkenly shouting old sea shanties, he sings along with the record. 

“I love you in a place

Where there's no space or time

I love you for my life

You're a friend of mine

And when my life is over

Remember when we were together

We were alone 

And I was singing this song to you.” 

“Po-“ she says, breathless. “What are you doing here?” 

Poseidon shrugs. “You summoned me. And when a queen calls, a gentleman always comes running.” 

Sally feels her face get hot, and her knees begin to buckle, but Po’s hand is strong against the small of her back. He keeps her pressed tightly against him and she makes the conscious choice to let his warmth comfort her the way it used to, and relaxes into his touch. 

She had forgotten how she felt when in his presence, how intoxicating it could be. Being around him filled her with confidence, making her feel invincible, and loved and safe. When she was with him, it was like they were the only two people to exist. _It seems some things never change,_ she think. She’s not sure how she ever let go of those feelings, how she ever managed to come down from the high of being with him, but she’s grateful to have it again, here and now. 

“Hmm,” she says teasingly, beginning to dramatically look around the room. “So where’s this gentleman you speak of?” 

Poseidon chuckles. “He’s on his way, I’m sure. Unfortunately for him, running is much slower than being able to appear wherever you’d like.” 

”Well,” she says, looking up at him. “Personally, I’m glad it’s you who showed up.” 

Poseidon smiles mischievously. “Is that so?” 

Sally nods, a playful look in her eye. “I was just thinking how I don’t really have any friends to talk to about what happened tonight, and I’m sure this gentleman is perfectly nice, but I haven’t known him quite as long as I’ve know you.” 

“Well, I know it’s been a while,” he says, pulling Sally in a little closer. “But if I recall correctly, talking was the second best thing we did together.” 

Sally laughs, and it sends a warm feeling of joy through every part of her body. “I remember it the same.” 

“Good,” he says softly. “Now tell me what he did so I can go turn him into something that’ll be fun to kill.” 

“No need for that,” she assures him. “I’m the one who did the hurting tonight.” 

Po smiles with pride. “You have always been a heartbreaker, Sally Jackson. Some of us have to learn that the hard way.” 

She smiles shyly as a pang of guilt courses through her chest. Instead of words, she simply wraps her arms around Poseidon’s waist and rests her head on his chest. 

He places a tender kiss to the top of her head and wraps his arms around her in kind. “Although tonight was nothing I need to seek vengeance for apparently, will you still tell me about it?” 

His voice is shy, and it makes her heart flutter. He has always been so tender and attentive with her. Even after all these years apart, there’s just something about this man that she thinks she will always come back to, one way or another. 

All the ways this evening could play out flash through her mind: the good, bad, amazing, and horrific. But when the song ends and Po only holds her tighter, all of her worries melt away and the truth becomes clear in her mind and in her heart: She is home.

Sally smiles against Poseidon’s chest, feeling as if she might burst from happiness. “I would love to.” 


End file.
